Life is a series of brainstorms, meetings (and negotiations), so you may as well develop some skills to help get you by
1 - Understand the Human Pattern of Listening
First you are attentive, then you wander off, then you come back from your own thoughts again and you wonder what somebody has been saying whilst you were in la la land.
People typically speak at a rate of 150-200 words per minute, but the human brain can process 800 -1000 words per minute. This encourages our minds to wander.
TIP: People require Auditory, Visual and Kinaesthetic stimulation to keep them engaged.
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2 - Headlining
Think of a newspaper or blog. It would drive you mad if you had to read an entire article to know what it was about.
Speech is the same. You can make a point and then give the backstory to it, that way if somebody wanders off into their own thoughts (which they probably will) you will still have delivered your message successfully.
TIP: Start a sentence as though it were a news headline, then fill in detail afterwards.
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3 - In/Out listening
Capture notes from the meeting, but also capture your thoughts so you can create space for what is happening in a meeting, and not just your own mind.
It also helps you avoid the need to interrupt people with an idea you feel compelled to share before you lose it.
TIP: Divide a pad into two halves and on one side write notes that interest you, and on the other write whatever pops into your head, regardles of if it feels relevant. That way your thoughts are captured and your mind is more focsed (kind of like Pomodoro interruption logging).
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4 - Take responsibility for your effect upon others
A grunt, a wince or a rolling of the eyes. People pick up on these non-verbal cues and can shut done their input because of it. This can be especially destructive during brainstorm situations.
TIP: Don't call an idea stupid (either with words, sounds or actions), because you are in effect calling the originator or the idea stupid too.
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5 - One idea leads to another, but only if you let it
Often a brilliant idea can come as a reaction to something said previously. If you shut down the 'bad' ideas, you kill the breathing room for better ones to evolve. It is hard but important to stay objective about ideas, even if you feel something sounds improbable at first.
Playing devils advocate (or thinking with the black hat) is an important role, but it needs to be done once there are ideas on the table. Choosing to play this role when others are trying to generate options is one of the main causes of failure within the brainstorm process. Don't be this person.
TIP: You should offer builds on ideas, take them sideways or offer something new, but don't fall into the trap of telling someone all the reasons why their idea is not possible/relevant/feasible.
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6 - Make statements instead of asking leading questions
People often use questions to lead others to their desired answer, rather than to actually seek an opinion.
TIP: Say what is on your mind rather than pretending to ask questions where you only want to hear the answer you already have in mind.
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7 - Enter a meeting with a clear idea of what kind of thinking is required
Do you want to share information? gather input? reach a decision? or solve a problem? If you can't answer this question then you shouldn't be at the meeting.
TIP: Let people know what kind out output you require from them before conversation begins. Setting an agenda item without a stated goal is not good enough.
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8 - Agree time limits for your meetings
We use the Pomodoro Technique at Harmonypark for our internal meetings, which means we cap things at 25 minutes, or break them into blocks (with short breaks in between). We also use a visible countdown timer to help us keep on track.
TIP: Obviously not every meeting needs to be 25 minutes long, or will fit into this timeframe, but setting a deadline is a useful technique for reducing the rambling nature of large group conversations.
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These techniques were picked up from a great course I did with a company named Synectics many years ago. You should give them a try and see how they work for you and your team.
